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"Virgin vs Non-Virgin ?
From virgin Oracle 'Pythia' from Greece to Belief of Daoism from China in Longevity of Life by sleeping with Virgin...our human kind is obssesed with Virginity.
2008, I was working with Greek ship owner to bring Panamax ship to his own country from Far East Asia. I still remember he brought his young Virgin daughter to hammer the anker and throw champagne to newly launched ship. He told me it is Greek Tradition to bring Good Luck by Virgin.
In USA, recent study shows virgin couples had least percentage of getting divorce than couples with pre-marital sexual intercourse.
So does it mean marrying Virgin promise you will have happier marriage than marrying non-virgin?
Well, it might give you lesser chance to get divorced, statistically speaking but being happier? It is very difficult question and there are not enough datas to even explain.
Today my story telling is about Virgin and Marriage.
A few years ago, when Russians brought conflicts to Ukraine and Malaysian airline got shot down, I visited Odessa, Ukraine for the first time in my life. And i still remember my taxi driver Sasha was telling me how he married his virgin wife and it was blessing to him and advised me to marry virgin Ukraine lady.
I couldn't believe even taxi driver in Odessa had uncompromising faith in marrying virgin is graceful. In U.S. it is almost impossible to find virgins over age of 21 unless you are in Texas or hard core Baptist Christian southern states.
Don't get me wrong, I do respect virginity and its values. And I want to share my personal experiences and some of my friends who have virgin wives and their marriages. And I really do hope these stories can help some of you to prioritize the qualities of your future wife.
1. What kind of Virgin?
Before you get all excited with meeting virgin lady or marrying virgin wife, i strongly advise you to verify what kind of virgin is your lady or your soon to be wife.
There are at least 3 kinds of virgins.
1st kind of Virgin is by her choice. These are very attractive young lady or mid age but respect herself and good education and wonderful career who had many guys attempted to sleep with them but they declined and protected herself. I gotta tell you. I really have strong respect for these types of ladies. Every factors have two sides which are pros and cons. We will examine a bit later.
2nd kind of virgin is undesirable left over virgins. This type..
I don't need to explain. No one wants them and nothing happened to them and who are being left over as virgins not by their own choices but no attempts from any guys.
3rd kind of virgin is again very elite and quite attractive but a girl from mafia family or military's high ranking dad or certain religious background thus many men give up or too afraid to attempt to sleep with them. And yes. We don't wanna mess with 3rd kind of virgin. It's not worthy to risk our life for it.
(In Turkey and many other islamic countries, if you sleep with your friend's sister who is virgin and if you don't get married ... Then you could end up dead and you can't really do anything about it)
After identifying the types of Virgins then next step is to find out what is their core personality of them.
I met and interacted at least 4 to 5 virgin ladies...and also i have a few male friends who were virgins and who got married as well.
My experience with meeting virgins didn't really go well. I found it was quite difficult to communicating with them. And often girls without experience dating males can be quite stubborn. They weren't too flexible. And I respect logical communication and flexible and compromising dialogue. Unless you are really bound to marry virgins, I can assure you..dating virgins can be quite challenging unless that particular virgin ladies have truly humble and caring attitude toward you.
Some virgin girls don't have sense of real world due to lack of experience. Their demand from boy friend or husband can be unrealistic and unreasonable. In many times husband or boy friend shall educate and guide them to realize the actual world.
Some virgin girls might not know how to understand man or don't know how to please man. They never been with men thus they might have all kinds of fantasies of being in love and fairytale like prince charming would find them and take them to far away castle. If you haven't dated virgin girls then soon you will learn hard way.
Some virgin girls can be truly self centered or selfish without knowing she is ... This could be the worst kind. You see...in many times ignorance can be devastating harm for some one next to her. These types of Virgins could take your kindness and generosity as granted. They might think they deserve all the best treat because they are virgins.
Let me share some of stories.
One my best buddy got into Microsoft. He was virgin ...hard working nerdy engineer. He got married at age of 37..still virgin married his wife 30 yrs old also virgin. He literally called me and asked me how to do intercourse by phone during honeymoon in Hawaii.
5 years passed..and my buddy was obssessed with fishing and kayak and all kinds of outdoor activities. I asked him why are you going nuts with all these outdoor sports. And he told me he needs to release his stress from his wife. Later on he told me that his wife doesn't like sexual intercouse and he was sleeping with his wife less than once a month. I was shocked and almost sorry for him. They were constantly fighting over small things and it's got worsen after they got kid. Their marriage seemed miserable that gave me such a negative aspect over marriage.
My another buddy from Texas..good looking and humble and great sense of humor..worked in white house who remained Virgin due to his religious belief. Got married to British wife...less than a year..his wife fell in love with another man at UK embassy in D.C. and asked for divorce.
He went thru very disappointing divorce and got into depression.
I really felt sorry for this guy. However he met really nice virgin lady from Texas in Costa Rica and dated for 2 years and got married and now settled outside of Dallas with 2 kids.
Final story is one of my Alumni buddy from graduate school who is cheif of Federal Gov't, makes great salary with nice home who never had luck with women was single. I knew him for nearly 20 years and i know he will treat his lady well. Thus I introduced 24 years old virgin from Southeast Asia. 2 years later they are happily married and living in D.C. now. And he even got promoted after marriage. He's got 2 houses nos and happiest man in D.C..
My real advice is ..
Virgin may actually bring blessing to your life..but
You need to focus on what kind of character is lying underneath virginity.
I personally believe lady's personality is more important than her simple virginity.
Is she giving personality or taking and selfish character?
Does she want to please you or she only care about her own feelings over yours?
Think about it gentle man.
If the girl dated a guy for over a year and more but didn't sleep with her boy friend...and her boy friend took care of her and supported her and plus plus..and she didn't give her whole love to him? Do you really think she was really in love with him? And how would she treat you while she is dating with you?
Of course...you don't want to end up with a girl who had 100s of boy friend and slept around with all kinds of men...that's just gonna be way risky for you to have faithful and healthy marriage. Nothing is impossible..i know one genius engineer from Dublin, Ireland who actually met his wife and strip club...and he knew this girl had 100s of various boy friends but they got 3 kids and settled down in New Jersey. Living mostly happy together for years.
I personally believe being faithful after marriage is what makes faithful to each other and many couples fail to keep faithful marriage.
I will tell you very funny story and will wrap up for today.
3 years ago i was in Jakarta to make some deals and my lawyer from Lebanon took me out for dinner at westen style bar. We were waiting for table and drinking wines and beers. And suddenly i heard female voice from the other side of bar.
" Hey you..I am talking to you!"
My charismatic lawyer answered, " Me? Hello there
..my name is.." And then lady said, " No not you! Your friend over there !"
She was 6 feet(180cm) tall blonde hair with blue eyes, late 20s gorgeous looking lady. And she walked toward me. And she was keep asking,
" Yes you. Who do you think you are? How come you act so confident and cool? Where are you from? "
I couldn't believe such an attractive girl with british accent was hitting on me in this very unexpected moment. I looked back and there was no one.
" Me? I am from states..northwest..how about you?"
Lady stopped and stood right next to me, " Yes you..I am from Edinburgh, Scotland. Do you know where is ?"
I said, "I've been there once."
And she hold my hand and whispered in my ears,
"Come on let's go upto my place and fxxx. Let's cut bullsxxx!"
At this point I knew she was hitting on me.
" I really appreciate your offer but i don't sleep with any one except my girl friend or wife. And you are not..any of them. Sorry."
And she calmed down and lowered her voice..and replied,
"I really respect that. That's very nice of you."
And she started talking about her personal life and how her marriage is falling apart..and how her husband doesn't love her any more. Then i knew she was trying to have an affair.
Again gentlemen...this is really awkward crazy funny experience but i am trying to make a point here...finding a good wife is hard but keeping and maintain healthy marriage is even harder.
I've heard her husband is general director in gas company from UK. She probably be well taken cared financially.
Relationship problem can't be solved solely by financial wealth. And to be honest with you i am not sure if she was always Slutty even before she got married or she was virgin? Who knows....
I always advise you to go back to fundamental basics.
Spend more time with lady if she has worthy valuable personalities. Can you trust her? Is she generous like you? Does she care about feelings? Does she give you back love? Does she know what it takes to maintain true love? Does she actually know what is meaning of true love? Without knowing these characters of her...being with virgin girl can be forever trap of demanding from her...
" I gave you my virginity and my everything and you must love me more and give me more!!!"
After all, Eve was virgin too and pressured Adam to get kicked out together from Garden of Eden."